Friends who are dear to me know I love Jesus. People who aren't close to me and are reading this now know. Hey y'all, I love Jesus. Not in a "you should come to the potluck" kind of way, but in a "that's my guy who sits with me by the lake inside my head" kind of way. You know those times when you are in your thoughts and need an arm around your shoulder and someone to listen? Yeah, he's my guy. The one who looks you in the face and says "Um, you are being kind of crazy." Yep, that's my Jesus. The one who kisses me on the forehead and reminds me that I am a big mess and he loves me just the way I am. My kind of Jesus. He's not one of my crafted fabrications. He's all biblical, and stuff. The point of this post is not to convert anybody. I'm not that kind of girl, so don't worry that you will accidentally get my faith on you just by reading this. My sweet, loving non-believer friends know they are totally safe around me.
A deep conversation came up in our family the other day that I really don't know how to handle. One of my little sisters thinks I always have the right answers, but I assured her that I am mostly faking it until I make it. I am going to keep the exact topic vague so we can all keep an open mind. I want to premise this whole topic with the fact that I am not a theologian. I am not a preacher. I am not a counselor. I am just a girl with a really good heart that feels most people are genuinely good and loving. Keep this in mind as I elaborate.
Class, I would like to start off with some definitions. Sin. Ooooh. Such an ugly word for almost everybody. As it should be. When I think of sin I immediately get the flashbacks of wooden church pews and discomfort. Okay, back to the definition. I wanted to go with a secular version of the definition because I feel that it is the most emotionally impartial. Enter Wikipedia: Sin is anything that goes against the ideal relationship between you and God. Simple enough. That is it. Now, I am pretty good on my bible stuff and understanding God's personality and I can tell you that this is it. Why does God hate sin so much? Because he really loves us and hates it when our relationship is "off". I also want to throw out the definition of the word "bigot" because it is being used a lot. As in, inappropriately and I am having to quote the Spaniard from Princess Bride every time I see it. Bigot: A person who is intolerant of any opinions differing from their own. A bigot IS NOT simply a person who decides not to go along with your opinion. As in, I am not a bigot because I will not accept strawberry ice cream as the best ice cream ever. We can all have opinions without being bigots. Please don't hate me for not being on board with strawberry ice cream. I like strawberries, I like ice cream. I'm just not a fan of the two mixed together.
Okay, back to sin. Let's imagine that your child is a heroin addict. The addiction to heroin would be the "sin" because it is an act that causes a wedge in your relationship. You therefore HATE heroin. I can pretty much assure you that your child hates heroin too, but the whole addiction dynamic is on a chemical level. The behavior of taking heroin continues to keep a separation between you two, but I know that as a parent you would fight to hold on to that relationship. You love your child and you SEE your child through the heroin. You hate the heroin though. To God, every sin is heroin.
I have some sin going on. Not heroin, thank goodness. If we are looking at old testament stuff I do a few things that are worth stoning. Like, death penalty stuff. I say God's name when I'm not addressing him, if you know what I mean. In the Old Testament that would warrant me getting pummeled with rocks. I have looked upon Ryan Reynolds with warm regard. Lust. I have put money and myself above God. I know He hates that. There are a lot of others, but I'll stop there.
It's a weight issue. Why am I hugged and lovingly accepted into church, but others are not? If the apostle John reminded us that a sin is a sin no matter how you slice it (I John 5:17) then why do some sins get more shame? We are all a hot mess. According to biblical laws, anyone who is divorced for any reason outside of an affair is really not divorced in God's mind. Not only that, the couple is constantly having an affair if they get remarried. Everyone is familiar with the profound divorce rate and we have all become pretty comfortable with blended families and second marriages. This issue holds less weight. Y'all get what I'm starting to throw out here?
I'm not saying that we should all start loving heroin, or divorce, or anything else that rends relationships. I am saying that we need to be mindful that we are not judge and jury. That's God's job. I believe there is a place to hold each other accountable in our lives, but when Jesus stepped on the scene he set a whole new set of rules for us. The number one rule that we all must follow is to love one another like he loves us (John 13:34). Aren't you relieved to know that when you stub your pinkie toe on the coffee table and you say "G-D!" you won't be stoned to death or at risk for smite?! Nope. God is not pleased that you use his name as a negative, but he doesn't want you to die about it.
There are some huge political issues going on in our world right now that leave me spiritually confused. These issue affect a lot of families. A lot of good, loving, sweet families. Even though I deviate away from God's perfect plan for me on a daily basis, I know he still is utterly in love with me. All the time. I know women who have gone through ugly divorces and become closer to God. Yes, it is a deviation from the ideal relationship, or a sin, but it does not mean that a person is lost from Jesus. That would be silly.
Christian friends, please just love people. That's really what Jesus wants you to do. As a matter of fact, please just love me. I fall short every day. I'm selfish and a bit miserly with my money. I really wrestle with keeping gossip to myself and I cuss like a sailor. I even use the f-bomb in my prayers when I am mad at God. There are whole sections of the bible devoted to how that is wrong on all sorts of levels. Just be loving to people. Yes, sin is wrong because it keeps us away from God's perfect relationship that he had planned for us. Just like heroin keeps a child from actualizing the dreams a parent had for the success of their adult child. Does that make sense? We won't have our perfect relationship until we all get back to heaven. Just a note, you can't get into heaven if God doesn't know you. I mean, I wouldn't let you live in my house if I didn't know you. Duh! If you ever want to know more about this just ask any non-creepy Christian of your choosing. We love talking about this. Actually, sometimes we will go from non-creepy to creepy, so you may have to rein us in a bit.
Okay, so here are my Jerry Springer final thoughts: You do you. As in, work on what you got going on with God and let God handle the others. Love each other and stop trying to divvy out weight on sin in an effort to rationalize which ones are better than others. They all suck. They all affect relationships in a negative way. Every. Single. One. I know it is trite, but really what Jesus would do is have dinner and make the most out of the relationship that exists. Drink a glass of wine and dish out some hugs. Gauge the appropriateness of telling someone the weight of their sin. I'm guessing they already know, and really is that your place or does that belong to God? I can assure you that I am fully aware of my shortcomings. They are waiting for me every morning as I wake up. What makes the difference in my day is the people around me who love me and let me show me that I am cherished. I'm not telling anyone to go around saying heroin is an acceptable recreation, or that divorce is the way to go. Just be mindful. Be the little hint of spiritual Jesus in the tangible world. It's pretty profound. Let's all do that.
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