Withholding Judgement

So, in a very sweet way, I have a few friends who reassure me from time to time that I am a good mother. It's great that we lift each up that way. Well, let's see if y'all want to lift me up this week after hearing my little lapses in judgement.

Let me give you a little background into my psyche. I love scary stories. They have fascinated me ever since I was little and I have this wild and colorful imagination to make these stories really spectacular in my head. My mini-me has this same love and I was so excited when she showed a particular interest during our trolley tour in Key West regarding a haunted house. There is nothing better than mixing a bit of fiction with a bit of fact to make a story juicy gooooood.

Well the other night Natalia brought up this story of Robert the Doll (which is good, but totally stupid) and I of course said we should Google it. Why, you ask? Because that is what totally dense mothers do for eight year old daughters right before bedtime. We Google ghost stories about vodoo possessed dolls who terrorized children so our child can actually get a visual image instead of just hearing this ridiculous story. 


Jeremy gave me a face and asked me the completely obtuse question "Do you think that was a good idea before bed?" Obviously my voice of reason was on vacation or had laryngitis, or something. Whatever. I couldn't un-ring that bell, now could I? In fact, Natalia chose that very night to grow up and be a big girl by insisting that she no longer needed to sleep with John Bear and Sleeping Beauty anymore. What a coinky-dink! It's been over a week and she is still a being a big girl with John Bear and Sleeping Beauty taking up bedtime residence next to the bed. At least they didn't get kicked out of the room.

Now, I am not always the fastest of learners. Again, voice of reason is out of commission and like most good wives, I only listen to about 60% of what my husband says. Bring on "mommy/daughter day". After a day of swimming at Grandma's pool and me showing Natalia how to do a back flip under water, I decided it was time to introduce my little boogerface to her first real scary movie. Now, I thought about it and threw out a few contenders due to sexual content or too "real", then I decided on Pet Semetary. Remember that 90's gem? Well, Jeremy's memory was better than my jaded and desensitized mind and again he warned me. Voice of reason said "What?", Natalia said "Oh, dad. I think you're late for work." and I said "It will be fine." Um.... no.


I think she was okay with Pascow and his brains hanging out because he was, after all, a "good ghost" (oh, my gosh. just writing this makes me feel totally incriminated). Then there was the toddler getting hit by the car. Nothing was really shown, but still, horrid. I hate cats - so that's scary for me. Then the invalid in the back room which I finally figured out was a man dressed as a woman (Raaaachellllll). Natalia finally called it quits when the toddler came back to life and bit that Munsters guy in the neck. I told her that was the beginning of the scariness in the movie. She was done. It's kind of like when we got her ears pierced. She will like it someday, she's just not ready for it now.

Needless to say, she was so scared after that movie, if she could have climbed back into my uterus, she would have. Yes, it was a horrible parenting moment. Just one of many, but I'm not perfect and I'm sure I'll hear about it from her therapist twenty years from now. Hopefully this won't warp her for life in some way. Like a twisted fear of toddlers, therefore she will never have that gaggle of grandchildren I am hoping and saving money for. Am I already paying for my mistake? You betcha! Guess who got kicked out of bed last night? I did. Natalia came into our room (again) to say she was scared. I think this time it was about 4am and I grabbed my pillow, muttered something about it being my fault, tucked my angel in next to daddy then headed off across the house. I had to finish off the night in her twin bed with Claire de Lune on repeat and a memory foam topper so plush my arm kept falling asleep. John Bear and Sleeping Beauty stayed on the floor because I'm a big girl too.